Original Entry Date:
September 13, 1998
Age: 15
Background:
Follow up to last entry, just trying to have it all-boys, popularity, etc.
Dear Diary,
Hey guess what? another cool weekend! Well on Friday I went to local highschools football game and well two things happened. Remember Cal? He was a jerk so forget him. Well now I met another guy, Dave and I am going to his Highschool's Homecoming with him. Then on Saturday/yesterday, Michelle came over after cross country and we went to my school's football game. That night, Maggie, Katie, & Kristen came over. That was fun so I actually had fun this weekend. I hope this will last though I doubt it. But oh well. Now if only I could get a date to my own Homecoming
Dear Megs,
It is funny how all we want in life is a perfect balance between good friends and love to be happy. As you get older, these two get much harder to balance and you will certainly miss the simplicity of only needing this for your own happiness. Life should be full of fine times with good guys and friends who are always at your side. So with that said, I have good news and bad news. Lets start with bad news: Dave falls by the wayside, you don't go to your Schools Homecoming and Maggie, Katie and Kristen will all turn on you later this year. The good news? In 10 years, you will find the perfect balance of boys and friends that are true and will stick around for good. (or so it seems now as I suppose this story is still being written)
This Diary Entry is a little sparse but based on my memories of this experience, I do have some advice and moments of clarity-take them for what they are worth Dave? Guess what? He didn't dump you. At the time, you were excited to have a boy like you but after spending more time with him at his homecoming, you decided he was absolutely not for you and chose to not continue anything with him. This honestly was your first time probably knowingly breaking a heart. Did you go about it the right way? Absolutely not, that poor boy was not treated very nicely by you at the dance. Lesson? What goes around comes around and you did have a guy(actually quite a few) turn around and treat you equally as bad. So even if you don't like a guy, let him down easy as it isn't nice to have someone you thought was interested in you do a complete 180 and act cruel. No one deserves that. It takes a much bigger person to treat everyone respectfully.
The girls? That was a tough one as I am sure I will write more on later. Back then, you were never part of a group and that hurt so hard because that's all you wanted. All it took to make you happy back then was to be included. But if they were true friends wouldn't they include you regularly? Just sayin. These girls turned on you the moment they could. Today? You are part of a large group and it is plenty of fun. But sadly I do notice we are slow to accept newcomers. This was something those girls had to work on back then and we need to work on today (yep even nearly 30 year olds can be unintentionally standoffish).
This post has been a bit of rambling but here is what I would sum it up as. Anyone in life whether they are young, old, single, dating, married, boy girl, man, woman, etc. --anyone in life simply wants to be loved. Men and Women want attention to be loved and wanted by someone else. Everybody wants to feel like they matter in others lives and that they make a difference. So if you don't want to be with someone, tell them so! if you love someone, tell them and show them! If you notice someone just wanting to belong, give them a chance! I think if we all pay attention to the wants and needs of others around us, we will all live happier lives. The golden rule is very true, treat others how you want to be treated, love others as you love yourself, etc, I could go on but I'll step off my soapbox until next time
Your Older trying to be Wiser Self
No comments:
Post a Comment